The Silly Express

At Jumble Junction Station, the little red train woke up with a wiggle in its wheels and a giggle in its whistle.

"Good morning, Silly!" called Conductor Dot. She wore a blue cap and a big smile. "Big job today. We’re taking a giant birthday cake to Picnic Park! We also have a box of balloons and Tuba Duck with his very shiny tuba."

Tuba Duck gave a polite quack and a toot. The cake wobbled like jelly. The balloons bobbed like happy bubbles.

The little red train puffed out a test whistle. It didn’t say choo-choo.

It sneezed. "HA-CHOO!" Colorful confetti whooshed out of the smokestack and sprinkled Conductor Dot’s cap.

Dot laughed. "Party whistle today! All aboard the Silly Express!"

They rolled out with a cheerful clatter. "Choo-choo! Ha-ha!" The sun warmed the tracks. The wind smelled like pancakes. Frogs by the pond waved with their big, bumpy eyes.

Around a bend, the Silly Express slowed. Right on the tracks sat Mabel the cow, big and brown with a swishy tail. She was munching the grass that tickled her nose.

Conductor Dot leaned out. "Excuse me, Mabel. Train coming through!"

"Mmm," said Mabel, chewing slowly. "This is the best grass. Very busy chewing."

The Silly Express tried again. "HA-CHOO!" Confetti sprinkled Mabel. She blinked. "Is it snowing sprinkles?"

Tuba Duck waddled to the edge and cupped his wings. "Knock, knock!"

Mabel blinked again. "Who’s there?"

"Moo," said Tuba Duck.

"Moo who?"

Conductor Dot grinned. "Moo-ve, please!"

Mabel snorted, then giggled, then laughed so hard her bell went ding! "Well, if you ask with a joke." She stepped aside and gave the train a friendly head bump. "Happy choo-chooing!"

"Thank you!" called Dot. The Silly Express puffed past, clacking happily.

They came to a long, wobbly bridge over the slow, green river. The wooden planks went tee-hee-hee as the wheels rolled on them. The Silly Express wiggled. The cake wobbled. The balloons bobbled.

"Oh-oh," said Dot. "These tickly planks make your wheels giggle!"

Tuba Duck rummaged in the Lost-and-Found trunk. "Aha!" He held up stripy socks. "Maybe socks will stop the tickles!"

Dot and Duck tugged the socks onto the front wheels—one green, one orange, one with tiny rabbits, and one with tiny trains. The Silly Express took a careful step. The socks went squish-squish.

"Not tickly now," said Dot. "Slow and squishy. Perfect."

Squish-squish over the bridge they went. The cake sat up straight. The balloons bobbed politely. Even the river seemed to smile.

On the other side stood a dark tunnel with a sign: Whisper Tunnel. Please use indoor choos.

"Indoor choos," Dot whispered. "Very quiet."

The Silly Express took a deep, gentle breath. "choo... choo..." The tunnel echoed, "choo... choo..." The echo sounded like a shy mouse.

Tuba Duck made a tiny tuba hum, like a bee. The balloons squeaked, but only a little. The Silly Express felt a giggle growing in its whistle.

"No big sneeze now," Dot whispered. "Think calm thoughts. Think... mashed potatoes."

The train thought of soft, quiet mashed potatoes. It worked. They slid out of the tunnel into bright sunshine without a single HA-CHOO.

"We’re nearly there!" said Dot. "Picnic Park, straight ahead!"

A breeze puffed across the field. The Silly Express felt tickly again. "HA-CHOO!" Confetti flew behind them like a silly rainbow. Three balloons popped with soft plips. The cake jiggled. Tuba Duck caught it with a careful wing.

"Candles!" Dot gasped. "Where are the birthday candles?"

A squirrel on a fence held up a handful of bendy candles like tiny flags. "Found these by the path!"

"You hero!" Dot traded the squirrel a balloon shaped like a nut. The squirrel saluted with his tail.

They rolled into Picnic Park right on time. Children cheered. Grown-ups clapped. A dog barked along with the clapping, which sounded like a drum.

The cake stood in the sunshine, tall and wobbly but proud. Dot stuck in the candles. "Ready?"

The birthday kid took a big breath. Everyone else took a big breath. Tuba Duck puffed his cheeks.

"One more sneeze," Dot whispered to the train. "Just a little one."

The Silly Express went, "ha-choo," very softly. A tiny puff of confetti danced up like pretend flames. The birthday kid blew, "whooooo!" The candles went out. Cheers!

"Hooray for the Silly Express!" shouted the children.

Mabel the cow arrived, wearing a confetti hat. The frogs boinged in time. The squirrel drummed with his tail. Tuba Duck played a wiggly tune, and everyone did the Wobble Cake Dance.

Conductor Dot patted the warm red boiler. "Cake delivered. Giggles delivered. Job well done, Silly."

The Silly Express purred. "Choo-choo. Ha-ha." And if a tiny sneeze sprinkled a little more confetti on the cake, nobody minded at all.